Darkest part of my life, my hair and surroundings showed it.

Darkest part of my life, my hair and surroundings showed it.

During the years of 2010 til 2012 seemed to be dark phrase in my life. Not only I had I discovered Reiki, but my outside world was being drowned in darkness too. As time wore on, my hair went on the dark side of plum.

I never gave it much thought. Until I heard a friend say…

“Emma you where clouded in that house as your hair and clothes got dark while you were living with X.”

My body froze as those words rang through my ears. It was the first time anyone had said that, it never occurred to me at any stage while I was living there. Although, time had passed when I heard this comment but it made me realise that what she was saying…

Was true.

Being on the dark side if plum was also a road to depression, unhappiness, in conflict and constantly in the eye of someone who was happy to keep me in the victim mode for good. But the good part is.

 I escaped.

Many of us don’t understand that the people around us can have a big impact on us and not realise it. The longer I stayed in that house, not only did my hair go dark but the clothes I wore went from bright pinks, blues, yellow to dark blue, dark green, burgundy and black. As many people who know me well are familiar that I’m not a fan of the colour black.

My diet changed from eating healthy to not wanting to eat at home. Food cravings were ravish in this part of my healing and continued for many years later.

Even my bed covers went from soft pink to a Japanese cover of red and black and that never lifted until I moved and the lighter colours came back. Even my makeup diminished at that time, to the point I stop wearing it.

I also spent many days shedding my old skin which was all part of changing who I was on the inside first. It was long before those changes became visible on the outside.

Next time, you find yourself being drawn to dark colours or a drastic change is clouding you, ask yourself ‘are you being affected by others?’ if so, look at what changes can be made.

Even if it means leaving that situation for good.

Post written circa 17thMarch, 2016, 24thAugust , 16, 11 April, 2017